marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I lost the right to judge tonight
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize