I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Randomize
