yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
