Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
