You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize