Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
