Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize
