just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize