ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Just high enough for therapy.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
