her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize