Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
