have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize