I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize