I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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