Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
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