I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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