I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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