So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
