Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
