Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
