like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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