doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Randomize
