you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Randomize
