Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
