Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
