porn star boner night. come get it.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I need a beard to bite.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize