i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
