Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
