I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
