He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
she looked like the before picture.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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