Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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