i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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