I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
