you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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