oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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