yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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