just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
