As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
