She announced her abortion via fbk
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
