Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
