I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
