my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
