I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
