i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
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