i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
