I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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