Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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