Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
