Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
