Christians are straight up FREAKS
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
