Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
i've created a new STD.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize