She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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